How Do Unicorns Have Babies?Elena rubbed her temples as Reno pestered her with questions, this was the last time she ever brought anything she liked to work, "I don't know Reno!"How Do Unicorns Have Babies? by BassGuitarGirl
"Well is the unicorn a girl or a boy? Is that his boy toy or a nipple?" Reno turned the poster Elena had brought to hang in her office and squinted at it carefully, "Is it a boy or a girl? Can unicorns be boys? How are ya supposed ta tell though? 'Cause that thing between its legs is really hairy but unicorns are really hairy all over so it could just be a really fuzzy nipple." Reno frowned at the poster and brought it close to his face.
"Reno I don't know how you tell!" Elena held her head in her hands, her well-polished fingernails digging into her scalp.
"Just tell me whatcha think Laney! You're a girl! Girls are supposed to know all about unicorns!" Reno whined and pointed at the poster, "What is it? Boy or girl?"
"Girl! They're all girls! Will you please put it back on the wall and let me go back to work?" Elena grabbed for the post
A Morning in the Life of RenoReno stared out the window of his room at the trees, waterfalls, and rock walls surrounding Healin as he pulled on and buttoned up his shirt, his face devoid of emotion. He hated mornings, they always came too early for his tastes. Noon, noon was a much better time to start the day. His thoughts were interrupted as Rude knocked loudly on the door.A Morning in the Life of Reno by shadowsintime
"Hey Reno, get your butt out of bed and get dressed! C'mon lets go, we're on the clock!" The familiar deep voice demanded from the other side of the door.
Reno smirks. "Five more minutes partner I was having this amazing dream about this blonde, I wanna finish it," he yells back as he pulls the last button through it's hole, slurring his words in a sleepy manner for full effect. He grins as he hears the door being thrown open, the knob slamming against the wall harshly; another chip of paint looses its purpose in life as it falls from the wall to join its brothers on the floor.
Rude stomps through the door and is halfway to Reno's bed b
Turks domestic argumentTitle: Turks Domestic ArgumentTurks domestic argument by Enide-Dear
Author: Enide Dear
Rating: some blood and lemon flavoured condoms
Pairing: Reno and Rude
A/N: I read the prompt ‘Newly wed secret agents having domestic argument during a mission’ and my brain immediately burped this XD
”All I’m saying is, it wouldn’t kill you to replace the fucking TP in the shitter when it’s empty.” Reno paused to get his breath back. His knuckles stung and he shook his hand to loosen the fingers. “I’m starting to feel like a fucking maid back home.”
Rude just grunted for answer as he was hauling the still struggling client back up on his feet.
“Newly weds,” he muttered to the bloodied man who was staring at them in disbelief. “Just back from out honey moon and he’s been bitching ever since.” He hit the man a few times in the gut for good measure and the guy slumped back to the ground.
Reno kicked him a few times in the ribs with a steel-toed boot
Reno x Reader | Life Changing (one-shot)Reno x Reader | Life Changing (one-shot) by annafuru
PRE-WARNING: There is suggestive sexual content in this piece of literature. Please read with caution. You have been warned.
Ever since you joined the Turks, your life has been forever changed by all the events leading up to the almost-destruction of the planet from Sephiroth's wrath.
Aside from all the death and sadness, you made some life-lasting friendships. And one of those friends in particular is a red-headed Turk. His name is Reno.
When you joined the Turks, he instantly stood out to you, and grabbed a hold of your trust.
Yeah, sure, he could be an idiot sometimes, but he always kept his loyalty at hand. Always.
At one point when you two were on a mission together, he saved your life.
You had fallen from a cliff; broken pretty much everything in you body, and lost a good deal of blood. Reno slid himself from a wire and carried you to safety with dedication.
The last words you heard from him in that event were, "Don't you dare die on me, yo... I love you too much,"
That Crazy Auto-Correct (and auto-complete) Ch.4Taking a break from his paperwork, Angeal flipped open his PHS to send Tseng a text.That Crazy Auto-Correct (and auto-complete) Ch.4 by Chaosbayne
If you’re free, I’d like to do that intercourse thing with you.
Reclining on his sofa with Tifa curled at this side, Tseng glared at his pocket where a beeping noise emanated. Tseng opened his PHS; reading the text that had appeared in his inbox.
Arching a brow, Tseng sent a response back to Angeal.
Well. I don’t think Tifa would be happy if I had intercourse with you Angeal. Perhaps you could ask Reno? He’s free right about now.
Opening the text from Tseng, Angeal’s eyes widened with horror as the blood drained from his face at the response.
‘What the hell??’ Angeal thought to himself, mildly panicking.
Looking at his most recently sent text; Angeal found out that the text did indeed ask to have intercourse with Tseng. Damn that auto-complete!
Mortified that he had asked such a thing of Tseng and even more horrified that Tseng had actually tho
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